Tuesday, November 20, 2012
Embryo Adoption Kids' Book
There aren’t many books about embryo donation. As children
born in this way age, though, there will be a need for books to explain their
stories to them.
IVF nurse (and former IVF patient) Janice Grimes saw that
parents of children born in unique ways were encouraged to share their
children’s story of origin with them; but how do you talk about in vitro
fertilization or embryo donation with a four year old? In answering that
question, Grimes wrote one of the only kids’ books to introduce the subject of
embryo donation. Embryo donation is also sometimes called embryo adoption, and
regardless of what it is called, it shares much in common with adoption.
Grimes has a teddy bear family introduce the topic. The
child asks, “Please tell me the story about your wish for a baby.” The parent
explains in somewhat specific terms about infertility. He then explains that because “Mommy and
Daddy can’t make a baby,” another man and woman would help them by giving them
an embryo. The language the book uses isn’t particularly scientific, but seems
to be age-appropriate. Fertilization is
described as “a special cell from Mommy and a special cell from Daddy” joining
together “to make a baby [which] then grows in a safe place inside Mommy.” The
embryo donation is described as another man and woman making such a tiny baby
and giving “us this baby to have as our very own.” The book then describes the
embryo’s stay in the new mother’s womb, birth, and first years with the family.
Embryo donations and embryo adoptions have been going on for
more than a decade, and Grimes does an admirable job of starting the kids’ book
library on the topic. The illustrations are friendly, the story is happy, and
the quite complicated topic of embryo donation is made understandable to a kid.
There are a few items to consider. The book uses the term
“embryo donation” and does not mention any contact with the baby’s genetic parents.
Some people who pursue embryo donation go through agencies which use home
studies, and which encourage open relationships between genetic families and
birth families (notice the slight tweak in traditional adoption language!)The
book affirms that the baby given while an embryo is the child being read to,
but I can imagine a child wondering “why was I given away?” This isn’t reason
to avoid the book, but it is something to think through before you read it to
your child. With the understanding that you might need to edit some pieces
aloud as you read it, this is a good book for your library if you’re
considering embryo adoption/donation. It’s also a good book if you just want to
educate yourself and your kids on something new.
Note: Janice Grimes has written many books on one template:
each book has the same illustrations, but the text differs from edition to
edition, and editions address various circumstances of birth, including IVF,
sperm donation, egg donation, surrogacy, and babies carried for male parents.
Separate editions of books exist for single-parent homes. This review is of the
edition focusing on embryo donation / embryo adoption. Each book has the same
title, so ordering it from third-party sellers on Amazon is not a surefire way
to get the edition you want. I’d recommend ordering it from her site:
www.xyandme.com
What unique kids' books have you found? You can leave your answers in the comments!
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
Thank you for introducing me to this author. My oldest daughter was conceived through IVF and I've been thinking a lot about how to share her story with her. I will definitely be checking out that website for our version of the story.
ReplyDeleteThanks for your comment. I wasn't sure how well this book fit into this website, even though it's been an important book for me to find. I'm really glad that it was helpful.
ReplyDeleteWhat a cool idea the author had to make all these books from the same template!
ReplyDeleteIt's pretty interesting, isn't it! It does let her tailor the story to many different situations which might not otherwise have a book written for them!
ReplyDelete